Juggling life through a bi-polar lens. Sometimes up, sometimes down. Mostly trying to tread water in the middle. Creating a likeness to a normal life. Whatever "normal" is...

Tuesday, 8 January 2008

Time to boost batteries....

After the rush of the Christmas build-up, being host on Christmas Day to extended family, the still more draining limbo betweenChristmas and New Year, I needed a nap!

"Luckily" I caught that bug that's going round. It's been on the news here- a norovirus (sp?). Headaches, aching limbs, feeling/being sick, running off to the bathroom over and over, shivering, fever....

I still say "luckily" because it meant that I could take to my bed! I know it was yucky, but I really think it did my BRAIN good to be reduced to firing only on very basic cylinders for a while.

Sunday 30th was when it first hit me: with a weak tiredness and a headache, like the feeling you get when you're about to go under with a head cold.

Last Saturday was my first time out of the house since it began, and yesterday was my first without a headache.

My next Open University Course doesn't start till the end of this month, so I have a couple of weeks to recharge and ehm, well, tidy up and get a bit organised.
Not even sure I'll be taking this next one. I got a distinction in that last one. Got the results just before Christmas. But.....

no matter how many times I do well at no matter how many things, there is still this voice in my head whispering two words-
the first is "Fluke!"

the other is "Fake!"

Never mind. I cling to the simple things. I'll recharge my batteries with basics. Like a cat who was so pleased to see me she snuggled up and slept on me; first under my chin, then on it, then up so close she had her face resting in my eye socket, all the time floppy from sleep and warm and soft and purry.

Whatever the aches and however many the demons, this is bliss. Me and Fluffy.


Asta said...

Hello Helen,
I would love some snuggles and a tickler undew the chin..I would pwefew you to a dustew..and I'm sending you a twillion hugs!! Awe you OK??Mommi is still sowt of sick aftew fouw weeks...
my fwiends decided it was wong to discwiminate and apologised, so now I haave to get this colow out..eeeeuw.
Please give Bob and The othew beaws and Dilly (who is NOt a beaw obviously)big smoochie kisses, and i'm twying to squeeze chiklit peanuts thwought the pooter(vewy messy)
Pleeez feel bettew and thanks fow witing

Helena said...

Awww, thanks, Asta!

I'll be ok. I hope (!).

Bit low, bit flat, that's all.

Thanks for the furry smoochies! Furry friends are the best kind, the most loyal, the most loving and the most helpful.


Ms. Creek said...

it's amazing how that warmth and those loves can help!

CHEWY said...

Do you have a little red flashing light that turns green when your batteries are fully recharged?

The first photo is awesome.

Sarah Nopp said...

Is Fluffy a cat or a small bear?!?

Lynda (Granny K) said...

Hope you are firing on all cylinders again real soon. Bed is the bestest place ever to be (I think). How wonderful to have a furbaby who loves you so much.
BIG CONGRATULATIONS on the Distinction - why are you surprised? I'm not!

San said...

I get all warm and fuzzy, Helena, seeing you and your cat. I can hear the purring--so soothing.

I've been at that place where my body took over and said "OK, San, take a break." For me it's usually a headache that sends me to bed. Headaches are mercifully less frequent in my advancing age. I believe it's diminishing hormones, accompanied by (I hope) my willingness to go a bit easier on myself.

Calamity Jane said...

Awww Fluffy looks lovely. Hope she's not all knotty like Dougal or pooey like Cami :-)

Hope you're feeling better now and charging round like the Duracell Bunny!

Chalkhills Collective said...

Congratulations on the distinction - you earnt and deserved it! Love the top picture, but I'm trying not to sneeze with the others!


YesBut said...

How many mothers do you know disguise themselves as a tree?

And what type of tree? - only oaking

Helena said...

Ms Creek,

I think animals give off more love than people!


I love that photo- my partner took it. I didn't know he was taking pic's of me, so I kept moving. Hence the blur. But I like this one much better than any of the ones that have me on focus.


I sometimes wonder myself. Sometimes she's just a huge fluffy slug!


You're very kind!
& I really love it when cats cuddle up like this. MIne don't all the time, only when THEY want to, so it's a real privilege!


I wish I could record her purr and stick it on my MP3. I could plug into it whenever I'm stressed!

Calamity Jane,

Never mind me, what aboutyou? Did you ever get well enough for a Xmas dinner (albeit weeks late??)
Fluffy sometimes gets knots on her belly cos she won't let us brush there. LOVES being brushed everywhere else. Favourite spot is the eyebrows.


Oh dear, not allergic to fur???? I can't have wool next to my skin, so I'd be no good knitting all the things you make!


Helena said...